funny inspirational life quotes

And you know what you know. He won’t expect it back.” – Oscar Wilde. Helen Rowland. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” -Zig Ziglar, “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” – Dalai Lama, “When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’ -Sydney Harris I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” -Lily Tomlin, “Well-behaved women seldom make history.” – Laurel Thatcher Ulrich, “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get a warm feeling that it brings.” – Robert Bloch, “The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.” –, “Always borrow money from a pessimist. “Life is short. The only people who do not change their minds are incompetents in asylums, and those in cemeteries.” – Everett McKinley Dirksen, 146 Funny Inspirational Quotes About Life And Happiness. What am I, a telescope? What is more supernatural than an egg yolk turning into a chicken?” – Rutherford Platt, “It’s a funny old life . After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.” – Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach, “Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.” – Franklin P. Jones, “You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.”  Woody Allen, “Do not take life too seriously. Funny quotes. Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.” – Jim Rohn, “A business like an automobile, has to be driven, in order to get results.” – B C Forbes, “We can see a thousand miracles around us every day. Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. Look in the mirror… that’s your competition.”, #20. Here are our favorite funny motivational quotes about life, work and becoming successful. . You need the negatives to develop.” – Anonymous, “Life is a blank canvass, and you need to throw all the paint on it you can.” – Danny Kaye, “If you hit the target every time it’s too near or too big.” – Tom Hirshfield, “There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.” – Bill Watterson, “If you end up with a boring, miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.” – Frank Zappa, “Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget tossing in the lifeboats.” – Voltaire. An inspiration that brings a smile, what more you can ask for. Love your parents. One person might tell you I’m an amazing beautiful soul. The amount of work is the same.”, #14. Required fields are marked *. Scratch where it itches.” – Alice Roosevelt Longworth, “Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats. Your email address will not be published. Doing what you like is freedom. Then I watch my dog look for a place to poop”, #40. Focus on gaining knowledge. – The Floor Focus, focus, focus! Not much.” – Ellen DeGeneres, “I have a simple philosophy: Fill what’s empty. You will notice a pattern. Stop looking for a partner. Eat dessert first.” – Anonymous, “Is prayer your steering wheel or your spare tire?” – Corrie Ten Boom, “People will sit up and take notice of you if you will sit up and take notice of what makes them sit up and take notice.” – Frank Romer, “Time is nature’s way of keeping everything from happening at once.” – Woody Allen, “Young people tell you what they are doing, old people what they have done, and fools what they wish to do.” – French Proverb, “Change is not a four letter word… but often your reaction to it is!” – Jeffrey Gitomer. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. . Life has a funny way of working out just when you start to believe it never will.”, #19. It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.”, #57. !” – Naruto Uzumaki, “I intend to live forever. #1. Your email address will not be published. Do not be discouraged if you fail a few times.” -Napoleon Hill, “Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you’re alive it isn’t.” – Richard Bach, “I’ll probably never fully become what I wanted to be when I grew up, but that’s probably because I wanted to be a ninja princess.” – Cassandra Duffy. “A boat doesn’t go forward if each is rowing his own way.“ – African Proverb, “A concentrated mind will pierce a rock.” – Japanese proverb, “What matters is not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight of the dog.” – Coach Bear Bryant, “If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success?” – Jerry Seinfeld, “Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.” – Arnold H. Glasow, “Marriage is when a man loses his bachelor’s degree And women gets her master’s degree.” – Muhammad Asim, “In the business world, everyone is paid in two coins: cash and experience. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” – Mark Twain, “A man is not paid for having a head and hands, but for using them.” – Elbert Hubbard, “Our snooze button does not have the power to delay the sun from rising in the morning. Your email address will not be published. That’s relativity.” – Albert Einstein, “Some people are like clouds. . You’re on your own. Forget all the reasons why it won’t work and believe the one reason why it will!”, #45. The fact that you’re alive is amazing, so you don’t get to say ‘I’m bored.” – Louis C.K. Unless you’ve got a good team, you can’t do much with the other two.”-  Lee Iacocca, “Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there.” – Josh Billings, “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” – Cathy Guisewite, “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. We can’t direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.”, #26. Because one day, you might wake up from your sleep and realize that you lost the moon while counting the stars.”, 110 Daily Inspirational Quotes to Inspire You to Greatness, 65 Inspirational Travel Quotes (With Images) To Wanderlust, 65 Daily Positive Quotes and Messages to Inspired, 100 Money Quotes and Sayings My Wallet like Onion Why, Your email address will not be published. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. “Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else’s path unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path then by all means you should follow that.” – Ellen Degeneres, “A lot of people think the whole purpose of life is just to collect stuff.

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